Prayer (part 1)

"Jesus called the Twelve to him, and sent them out in pairs. He gave them authority and power to deal with the evil opposition. He sent them off with these instructions:
"don't think you need alot of extra for this. You are the equipment...""
Mark 6:7-9 - The Message Remix

Why do we pray for healing? Is it because we have been taught that and never questioned why? Is it because we have no faith?

In the passage above it says authority was given and Jesus even says it again before he ascends to heaven.

Ever since I was a tiny kid I've seen people spend hours praying for the guy or gal that was in the wheelchair and had to face the heavy disappointment as that peron came out of the church with the condition still lingering.

Something I've picked up from the stories of Jesus: never once did that man pray for someone to be healed (correct me if i'm wrong), never once did He ever face the questions of why someone wasn't healed. Every single person that came to Jesus walked away whole.

In todays world...we have the power and ability to speak and have illness disappear. Yes, it'd be in the name of Christ but we have that authority to speak and have every single physical and emotional discomfort bow at the name of Jesus.

So again to restate my question: Why do we pray?

I mean I could be completely wrong but this is just my opinion...as far as healing in concerned i feel that it is a genuine waste of time.

For example, my dad has boughten me a Fender Telecaster guitar and given it to me.

I have the right to play it when i want.

I have the right to play it how i want.

If i go to him every time I want to play it and ask him if it's ok, I am wasting time and besides getting frustrated he wouldn't know how to respond!

I feel like that's how we treat the gifts and abilities God has given us. I believe we need to step up and take ownership of these things because there is only so much that God can do. Granted, he is all powerful but He created us to use us and to use us effectively.

Daddy's Character

Goodnight to all ye fears.
Fueled by disappointments
Accompanied by tears

Goodbye all ye sorrows
Resting your head
These doubts, you'll borrow

Stars light my way
Sun ignite my joy today
And may this negative find its way to fade

From a beggar to a prince
I thought my life was finished
but daddy you took me in...

My heart belongs to you
For you remain steady and true
And all those times I forgot about you
You were there through and through

God is love

I am tired.

I've learned that after so long of anxious thoughts, happiness, tears, ect...I have worn myself out.

For so long I have tried to wrap my mind around love which ultimately is trying to figure out God.

One of my favorite bands has a quote in one of their songs that says:

"Is your love really love? Is my love really love? I think that love isn't love unless its love til the end. Is your god really God? Is my god really God? I think that God isn't God if He fits inside our heads"

Needless to say, I can't stop listening to this song just because of the message it sends. God is love. The end. No philosophies, no theories, no anything! God created love their for meaning thats what He is. You can define love be the characteristics of God.

I don't wanna hear or come up with anymore "answers" it's all crap.

God is love. The End

New Daylight song...this is just the acoustic version and as I am writing this it is 6:46 and i wrote this song an hour ago and recorded it on my iSIGHT and presto! You got a video! Not great musical ability haha. Um, this is my letter to God about the last few months of my life.

Let me know what you think.






i've been moving mountains on my back
And I don't know if i can escape from myself
It's the simple things that get me down
Maybe one day I'll come around

Breathe in deep, take it slow
I'm in your arms and thats as far as I'll ever go

Legend has it that you walked on waves
And someone said that your love never fails
I don't know why you would pick me
With all that said I have no choice but to believe

Breathe in deep, hold me now
I'm in your arms and thats as far as I'll ever go

Here I am to Worship (cover)

I recorded Here I am to Worship its one of my favs...

(right click/save target as/download)

http://aaronwagner.webs.com/Here%20I%20am%20to%20Worship.mp3

Oh, the humanity!

I had an interesting debate with myself this morning.

See, i'm not a very political guy. In fact for the most part, I hate politics but i do have my beliefs and opinions about certain issues.

As i sat on my porch swing this morning, the wind was slightly blowing, the fire engines across the street were testing sirens and horns, the sky was cloudy and I found myself in between the tasks of reading a book my friend Cassi lent me, Rob Bells, "Sex God" and vigorously searching for meaning behind why I believed the things I did.

In this book Sex God, Rob said something that hit me hard:

"How we treat creation reflects how we feel about the creator"

Wow.

I then started thinking about the death penalty. I have, in the past agreed with it, supported it and for the most part supported politicians who have done so as well. I mean, if a guy rapes and stabs a little girl to death (true story)...he should die. Right? I mean, what if that was my little sister?

As Rob's quote was ringing in my ears i brought myself to the biggest question of all:

Would Jesus ever be the one to push the button for those lethal chemicals to enter that persons body? Would He be the one that would even resort to that as a solution?

Ponder.

I think there may be a second part to this later.

Blazing...

The clock was at a stand still. I found myself sitting in the parking lot of my church empty and restless to feel worthless. It was a moment in time where it felt as if my very lungs avoided breath as the tears flowed down. I had just been broken.

I remember shouting to God searching for any sign of redemption but finding none in the bitterness that was dwelling in my heart. It was so hard to let go of. I realized that I was searching for a love I had been talking about for years. I love that I said I knew; one that I said i had experienced. So why was today any different? Why was it that I now felt so hollow?

I could spit out theories and ideas about why but it was because i was soley basing my faith on everything going well. Not Him. I think He used it as a way to shake my foundations in order to wake me up and say "buddy, its you and I that matters...I'm all you need."

This wasn't a revelation but a reminder of who I serve.

My goals, dreams, ambitions, cares, worries, stress, smiles, laughter...and my heart, belong to Him. He is my goal, my hopes, my dreams, my love. His promise is that He would never let me feel empty with Him...and as I search for His heart for each moment in time...I am fulfilled...I desire nothing else.

My God, savior, best friend, brother, creator...daddy...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that I walked away because I thought I could do it on my own, that I could do it without you. You are everything. Gladly will I remain with you...in your arms of love.

-Aaron